For those that have been following along, this post is likely not a surprise. As of now we've put our adoption journey on hold.
When we first started this journey we passionately felt that this was what the Lord was calling us to do. Just because we've put this on hold doesn't mean this doesn't still hold true. With complete confidence we are so sure that this process was a part of our plan.
While it might seem disappointing to our followers thinking that this process is fruitless without a child at the end of it, this process was anything but fruitless. In this process we've been drawn closer to God, closer to eachother and he has really broken our hearts for what breaks His.
As I think back on our first days of the journey we were open to a healthy infant 0-2 months old and this was still SCARY! Six months later we were considering children over the age of 10, HIV+ children, and children with Down's Syndrome and it actually wasn't so scary. Talk about a dramatic change. That was all the Lord, we would have never been open to considering any of this when we first started.
So part of me says - OK Lord, we were willing to do something extreme, and then you opened our hearts to something even MORE extreme, why are we putting things on hold now? How can something this "good" not be a part of your plan? But putting things on hold doesn't mean this is over for us. What all of these changes in the process have done is help us to better discern His voice and understand our calling.
Here are some of the MANY things we've learned:
1. The orphans of the world are His children. We aren't going to be able to save them all by ourselves, it is through him that we are used to help - he doesn't need us and that burden is not on our shoulders. Thinking if we don't adopt them, they are doomed shows a lack of faith in Him, prayer can do amazing things.
2. Just because something is "good" in the eyes of the world does not automatically mean it is in God's plan for you.
3. Learning to discern His voice in any process is an amazing gift.
4. He reveals his plan for you in your everyday life, through little things, through big things - He is everywhere and therefore if you attune yourself to His voice, you'll find guidance anywhere and everywhere.
5. We want to help families stay together in Ethiopia.
Disclaimer, this doesn't mean we are anti-adoption at all. We are pro-trusting the Lord and following his voice intently. For us that means to wait until we know what's next, it could be to pick this process up again! Who knows? The Lord does, and that's why we are content in this waiting/holding period.
As many of you know I have an Etsy shop that helped fund the initial part of our adoption. I want it to continue with that same mission to help families stay together in a non-dependence forming way. I've found quite a few organizations with micro-grant opportunities and that work with re-unification in Ethiopia. More to come on this. I'm praying about and searching for a organization to partner with so these paper flowers can help families!
Side-note. My posts have been lacking pictures recently. I need to work on that, I know.